Sunday, 7 September 2014

Better Together - Homer Simpson Style

I just recoiled in horror at this:

http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/scotland-independence-vote/orange-march-boost-for-scotland-independence-yes-vote-prounion-campaigners-fear-parade-will-only-alienate-catholic-support-30557200.html
Horrified: Me



Yes.

That's right.

A pro-union organisation that has an obvious polarising effect and is clearly not welcome in this particular arena is barging in anyway, even though it's been clearly told to stay away.

Salmond to Cameron: "Yep, they're coming to 'help' ye Davey boy. Nae luck son....pppfffffff......."


Is the OO actually controlled by anti-union plants?

It's the only logical conclusion I can think of, for given their impressive capacity to put one foot in front of the other in an orderly fashion it's obvious that they aren't SO stupid as to think that they're lending a hand to the cause (seriously to be THAT thick marching would be out of the question...)?


"But surely the have the right to support their brethren in Scotland"

Yes.

100%. I'm not claiming otherwise, I'm simply highlighting 'objective vs methodology' wrt 'getting the job done'.

Let us take some comparisons:

OBJECTIVE: LOSE FAT, PUT ON MUSCLE AND OBTAIN A MORE ATHLETIC PHYSIQUE

METHOD #1 (absolutely entitled to do so): Sensible diet plan, a regular exercise regime and training with a friend/rival

METHOD #2 (absolutely entitled to do so): No exercise, watching all HBO series back-to-back living only on nachos, fries and beer/soda

If your eyes are on the prize you'll aim for method #1 (with the occasional binge on method #2). Why? Because that's what you have to do to get what you want.


Common sense & discipline
Orange Order's approach?



OBJECTIVE: TO SUCCESSFULLY PASS UNIVERSITY EXAMS

METHOD #1: Complete all assignments on time. Keep ordered, concise notes. Recap constantly through the year. Work on weak points. During exam time employ a sensible timetable with enough time for work, eating and exercise

METHOD #2: (Most common approach): Wing most assignments, keep making plans about 'tightening up' only to head straight to the pub now (mid-week) that you're full of resolve for one last unsanctioned bender.
Blindly panic when exam time comes and live solely on coffee.

METHOD #3: It'll be fine, do nothing and go out on the tear the night before every exam

Again, you're entitled to do whatever you want, the question is though WHY would you sabotage your own objectives?


Now, arch-republican-secret-agent (he must be surely? This is clearly detrimental to the Union!) Rev Mervyn Gibson has answered (fobbed off) such logical criticisms:


or?             





"I have heard that argument," he said. "The Orange Order is a major part of Scottish life and is entitled to demonstrate its view. I hope that it galvanises people to vote No."

I shall address this part by part:

"I have heard that argument," - Good, why then do you not have a decent argument to show that the criticism is incorrect?
If you can't argue that it is incorrect then it MIGHT just be correct, in which case you're surely obliged to have a wee rethink?

""The Orange Order is a major part of Scottish life and is entitled to demonstrate its view." - It may well be, but it is also a controversial part of Scottish life.
It IS entitled to demonstrate its view, that doesn't mean that it HAS to

NOTE: Irish nationalist quarters are very quiet on the matter though they obviously have feelings on the topic. This could be because it's not their fight OR (AND?) it could be they're smart enough to know that their involvement could push some swing voters into the No camp, remember that a lot of Scottish sons went home from NI in body bags, having Gerry Kelly and the like endorsing the Yes campaign could reopen some old wounds.

Nationalism: Schtum




"I hope that it galvanises people to vote No." - How?!
 How does marching impress anyone who doesn't march?
 If it did then Northern Irish Catholics would be all unionists courtesy of our thousands of annual band parades.

Basing a movement on 'hope' is not very inspiring....


Alex: Before the OO announcement

Alex: After the OO anouncement





This is what other people think of the matter:

"... the Order isn't part of our campaign and never will be". - Senior figure in the 'Better Together' campaign - TRANSLATED AS "PLEASE GOD NO!"

"The Orange Order have nothing to do with us," - Better Together spokesman - TRANSLATED AS - "THESE F*CKTARDS WILL RUIN EVERYTHING"

Hint



And this nugget regarding a former UDA commander:

 "Sam "Skelly" McCrory, commander of the Ulster Defence Association's prisoners in the Maze prison during the last years of the Troubles, said Northern Irish loyalists would alienate Catholic voters and other centre-left Scots who plan to vote against independence if they showed up in Scotland."

http://www.theguardian.com/politics/2014/may/11/scottish-independence-uda-ulster-loyalists-campaign



What does it take to get hard-line unionists to listen to their fellow British citizens?


Willy Wonka: Not surrendering...



*NOTE: Though I'd be a little bit sad to see Scotland go, I wish her and all those who sail in her the very best should she decide to go the way of independence.